I know a woman who has a dream.
Each time we speak she tells me about her dream. Then she says she just needs to get her house clean and organized before she can begin.
She lives alone (not even a pet) and is financially independent, so she doesn’t work. And for the twenty years I've known her, she’s been trying to get that house clean and organized so she can begin to work toward her dream. In that same twenty years I've watched her do many positive things: organize numerous successful fund raisers for non-profits, spent endless hours helping people who were down on their luck, cheerfully pay uncountable visits to the sick, elderly, lonely and troubled. She's been a good friend to many and a source of inspiration to many, many more. Hers hasn’t been a wasted life. But she's never pursued her dream.
She’s desperately ill now. Whether she'll survive or not is up in the air. I think her life has been a good and useful one, but when I spoke with her a few days ago she once again shared her dream with me and her regret that she never reached out for it. Then she paused, smiled, and told me she was going to try for her dream despite her illness. But first she needed to get her house cleaned and organized.
Something that's helping me write today: The joy and relief that comes from being a FlyBaby and the memory of this sentiment from my friend Joan, "I'm guessing when I reach those pearly gates Saint Peter isn't going to care how clean my house was, but he may be impressed with the fact I always kept the bird feeder in my backyard full."
Each time we speak she tells me about her dream. Then she says she just needs to get her house clean and organized before she can begin.
She lives alone (not even a pet) and is financially independent, so she doesn’t work. And for the twenty years I've known her, she’s been trying to get that house clean and organized so she can begin to work toward her dream. In that same twenty years I've watched her do many positive things: organize numerous successful fund raisers for non-profits, spent endless hours helping people who were down on their luck, cheerfully pay uncountable visits to the sick, elderly, lonely and troubled. She's been a good friend to many and a source of inspiration to many, many more. Hers hasn’t been a wasted life. But she's never pursued her dream.
She’s desperately ill now. Whether she'll survive or not is up in the air. I think her life has been a good and useful one, but when I spoke with her a few days ago she once again shared her dream with me and her regret that she never reached out for it. Then she paused, smiled, and told me she was going to try for her dream despite her illness. But first she needed to get her house cleaned and organized.
Something that's helping me write today: The joy and relief that comes from being a FlyBaby and the memory of this sentiment from my friend Joan, "I'm guessing when I reach those pearly gates Saint Peter isn't going to care how clean my house was, but he may be impressed with the fact I always kept the bird feeder in my backyard full."
6 comments:
K.M. Saint James said...
I like this woman's view -- the full bird feeder. As for reaching for her dream, maybe that's exactly what it's always been. Just a dream and nothing more. Dreams don't come true. Goals do.
Regina Richards said...
Absolutely true, Sandra. Dreams are lovely inspiration, but I need goals and perspiration.
Jen FitzGerald said...
That's terribly sad, Regina.
Wendy S Marcus said...
As a nurse, I've cared for many patients nearing the end of their journey, and so many times I've heard, "I wish I'd taken the time to......." It's one of the reasons I've decided to really buckle down and pursue my dream of publication. It's difficult to stay focused using self imposed deadlines, but I do my best. When you're not being paid to write, it's easy to put it off to do other "more important" things. But I've learned to ignore the dishes in the sink and the clothes on the floor. I don't want to be one of those people who look back at their life and says, "I wish I'd......" And if I'm never published, at least I'll know I tried my hardest!
Regina Richards said...
@Jen It would be very sad to me except that I believe with all my heart this woman has lived a life of goodness and generousity well beyond average and I believe heaven will roll out the red carpet for her when she arrives. While I'm sorry she never reached out for her dream, I sort of see hers as an "It's a Wonderful Life" type story. "No man is alone who has friends." :)
Regina Richards said...
@ Wendy Like you, I feel I need to reach out for my dream, even if I fail. When I played basketball a million years ago, I could lose a game with relative serenity as long as I knew I'd done my very best. If I fail to get published, I want the serenity that I feel will come with knowing I gave it my best shot.